One of the most widely debated subjects of this era. Of any era for that matter. Religion of today is probably in a far different place than it’s ever been. What was once revered for its moral high-ground, it now stands reviled for its actions and judgmental points of view. While both of which are actually applicable, I do in fact believe that ‘religion’ in it of it self receives some unfair criticism. People have even placed it in a category by calling it ‘Organized’ to make it sound like some type of institution that’s just out to condemn and send people into the fiery pits of hell. With that said, I still believe that there are a few things that people say about ‘organized religion’ that may in fact be myths.
So let’s go there. Before writing this entry, I asked myself (for months), why do people hate religion so much? (Isn’t that a great question!) I would say the most passionate answer I’ve heard is that religion is the cause of so many of the wars that have happened in this world. Hmmm…Wow, that’s a tough one. I guess that’s kinda true. Yes, there have been wars where religion has been directly at the center. Two come to mind right off the bat: The Crusades, a series of ‘holy’ wars that lasted in the close to 400 years. Sanctioned by various popes of that era, the crusades were basically about taking the land of Muslims to so that pilgrims had access to the Eastern regions (ex. mostly Middle Eastern countries). Well, I guess the way I think of that is: you’re trying to come and take my land and don’t expect me to fight for it. Right…Nah, I’m gonna fight. Hey…it happens. Then there was a war that lasted 30 years called appropriately ‘The Thirty Years War’. This war was mainly a European war in which Roman Catholics wanted to enforce religious unity. In other words they wanted everyone to have the same religion and belief-set. Now we all know that it’s tough to get 20 people to think the same way, let alone a whole other region of countries. Even with this, while it may have started for religious reasons, it really became about one region, conquering another, which is generally what happens in all wars, right? Anytime you have a bully, no matter what they believe, it always comes down to their true motives. To conquer. To take over regardless of the consequences (just a thought).
Another “myth” that’s out there is that religion is a form of control. It is said that religious folks tend to try to push their way of morality upon others. They want to make everyone believe what they believe, and if you don’t follow them, you are in the wrong and all going to reside in the eternal pit of hell. Again, that’s a tough one too. Reason being, is that there are people out there who want you to believe what they do. There are people who would like nothing better than for you to do things their way, and see morality as such. That’s just honest, I can’t lie about it. There are people like that who claim to be Christian or Muslim, or what have you, that are that way. Those groups of people are generally called cults, ISIS, ISIL, those ill Kool Aid drink folks or whatever. They are the probably the most extreme examples, but nevertheless, they are out there. It is also true that religion hasn’t done itself any favors to endear itself to others when you have people like popes, jihadists, pastors, and my favorite, KKK members, spreading the ‘so-called gospel’of what they believe to be true. While a lot of religion is in-fact about evangelism, not everyone involved does it in a way that is forceful. Then there’s people like Kim Davis, who has a press conference to tell the world that God told her not do her job. Hmmm…As a matter of fact. Religion in of it self is supposed to be peaceful. It’s just that there will always be those that mistreat individuals and say it’s because of one thing, but truth be told, it’s really about the power.
Again, these are some of the tough truths to face about religion and where it’s been. Especially in today’s day and age. People really don’t get down with religion. They want it out of their government, let alone a part of their personal lives. Concerning the whole argument of control, I’d like to submit this: Control suggest that people don’t have a choice in a matter or situation. Most religions are not about choices, but consequences. Religion says that if you don’t do something, then something may happen as a result. While some may insist that to be a scare tactic, or a way to control others using their own fears, I’d say that contrary to your belief, people fear religion because it can be very powerful. That’s probably why they believe it to be control. When you get a bunch of like-minded people together to accomplish a goal, things generally tend to get done. Religion can be used to unite people. That’s what some consider to be dangerous. The things is this though, for those groups that people fear: If I went to a store and robbed the store in your name, would that mean that you did it? Consider the fact that everyone who claims a religion, may not always be what they seem. People tend to be leery of clergymen anyway, so why would you believe the extremist are acting in the best interest of a deity. I think that’s easier to believe than most might think. For example, Hitler claimed that religion was the reason why Germany wasn’t great. So he persecuted Jews, and Christians. He wanted to kill them to remove them from the picture. Sound familiar. Today, you have people like (I’ll just throw a name out there), Donald Trump, who claim that the reason that ‘America’ is no longer great is because of people of a certain religion (Muslims). He says that in order for us to be the best again, we need to eliminate the threat of Muslim terrorism. Again, sound familiar. What he just so happened to omit from his statement, were that most of the in-country acts terrorism that happens in the streets, or movie theaters, or schools around the country, are committed by (you guessed it) Mus…no wait…Americans (wait…what?) Not just any old American, white Americans. Hmmm… Sorry Mr. Trump, just wanted to bring a bit of truth to the puzzle. Oh, and did I mention that Trump, claims to represent Christianity. We all know that’s not religion that causing him to speak this way. It’s plain old ignorance. It’s not educating yourself to the differences between different cultures and how they live (peacefully).
Again, it took me a while to write this, because you don’t just wanna come out and make a statement without having some basis of fact. So here’s your facts if you like them so much. Out of the 1700 some odd wars that this world has been faced with, only about 120 or so have been primarily based off of religion. Most who don’t care for ‘organized’ religion probably don’t talk about that. They love to make generalizations about why religion is so bad, but never mention that there are religions out there that are doing more for the country’s homeless, than the government they so intently rely upon (just saying).
And that’s not all:
While ‘organized religion’ does have its pitfalls. There are a few things that it does not carry responsibility for:
- Starving people
- People who can’t afford homes
- People who live daily without healthcare
- People who have no clean water supply
- People who’s water supply has been poisoned
- Cops killing black men in the middle of the streets
- People being mistreated, hung, or maimed due to color of their skin (did I already mention Racism?)
Shall I go on:
So the next time you would like to blame all the worlds (or country’s) problems on religion, remember, man has and will always be the common denominator. It’s about his choices, and how he chooses to treat others on a daily basis. God may have given man this earth, but man is the one that made all the choices on what to do with it.
More to Come…
It’s too big (big)
It’s too wide (wide)
It’s too strong (strong)
It won’t fit (fit)
It’s too much (much)
It’s too tough (tough)
He talk like this ’cause he can back it up
He got a big ego
Such a huge ego
I love his big ego
It’s too much
He walk like this ’cause he can back it up
As I sit here snickering to my self, I’m not gonna pretend I didn’t know what Beyoncé was talking about when she came out with this song. My first thoughts were, “Oh She Nasty”. After that were, “Yep, I like that, that’s true (LOL!!)!!” I do really like that song. It’s a good song, but at the same times it talks about a subject that a lot of women find it difficult to get into. The male ego. Even though the lyrics of the song are somewhat suggestive and sexual, the underlying message is clear. Women have to be unafraid to cater to the male ego. I know what you’re thinking, “Jason, why should I have to cater to an ego, after all doesn’t that mean the man is just being overly sensitive or a punk?” Maybe…I get it. You don’t wanna have to submit to a man’s every desire, his wish is not always your command. I truly do, but then again, there’s an alternative. Your relationship could be over very soon, or the marriage you’ve spent so much time trying to have could fail, when you could’ve done something about it. Hmmm. What you won’t do, another will, right? Thought so.
Anyhow, Let’s dive in…
Ego is defined as the part of the psyche that experiences the outside world and reacts to it. I’d say that’s a pretty solid way of putting it. The thing is, the definition suggests that there aren’t different types of egos. The male ego is definitely different from anything else in the world. I say that because it’s a fragile one. Right… But what exactly makes it so fragile. I’ll tell you. Men seem to require things that most women don’t even think about. And here’s a secret ladies. A lot of it doesn’t necessarily involve sex.
What do you mean, Jason? We all know that all men think about is sex and how they can get it. They think about when the next time is going to be. They think about how many times a week they can get it. They gotta have it. Show me an who isn’t all about sex and I’ll show you a woman!! Wow. Pretty strong statements. And yes you made some points, but ultimately you’re wrong. Yeah, I said it. You’re wrong if you think all men want is sex. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’ll do in a pinch. And everywhere else too, but it’s not the thing that gets us up in the morning or makes us wanna pay some bills. It’s not the thing that motivates us to do better. To make something out of ourselves, or to be devoted husbands or father’s. Or even a great boyfriend.
Again, don’t get it twisted, men do want SEX!! Trust me we do, but we also want someone whom we can tell our secrets to. We want to be told that we are desired, because after all, we live for the thrill of the hunt. We are like predators. Not sure if that sounded enticing, but Hey, there it is. While we love the thrill of the chase, we also wanna know that if we get tired, a woman will slow down a lil bit, to make us feel like we’re getting closer to our goal. It’s not that we’ll stop, we’ll always run to you and after you. There are just times when you have to make sure to let us know, that you’re still the same gazelle we’ve been chasing all along.
Got another thing to tell you. The secret to every successful relationship out there is….(drumroll please….) INTIMACY!!!
If you guessed it, then I gotta hand it to you, you must have a pretty good relationship on your hands. Intimacy is defined as a close familiarity or friendship ; a closeNess. See the mistake that most make is that intimacy can come from sex. When The truth of the matter is that sex can come from intimacy, but not the other way around. You have so many people trying to hold on to their relationship or marriage with a physical connection when the truth of the matter is the physical only last for a bit. But when it’s psychological. It really matters. It also has the tendency to last a lifetime. You ever think about a relationship where one person dies, and then a few years later, the other is not far behind? Those are the relationships where the couples are so intertwined that it’s almost as if they cannot live without each other. SO when one goes, so must the other, because they are just that connected!!!
Ladies, here are a few questions you may have to ask yourself. How many times have you told your man he’s sexy? Or better yet, how many times lately? When you told him, did you pinch him, touch him, smile at him? Have you ever called him just to say I miss you today and I can’t wait to see you? Or maybe, I wanna rip your clothes off right now, and I gotta have you? Not only saying that, but then keeping that same feeling all the way till you get home, or to a place where you can fulfill that want/need? Wooo. That’s what I’m talking about. I need somebody to tell me they want me. Not just once, but the moment they felt it. Or when we first see or talk to each other. Tell me you Love me. Tell me you need me. Tell me you want me. I guarantee if you matter to him, he will respond.
All I am trying to say is that while sex can be a vital part of any relationship, it’s not ultimately the thing that will sustain it, or keep it from dying. The actual communication, intimacy, occasionally accompanied by some touching goes a long way. When I say occasionally, I don’t mean once every other month, y’all… I mean the rubbing of the back, or feet (I guess). Handholding, maybe even scratching that palm to let him know, it’s about to go down!!! What about, a nice moan when you touch him to let him know he’s still sexy to you, without even having to say it. Our ego is so strong. We need to feel wanted, Loved, Needed, and like the sexiest cat on the face of this earth. We need to know that it doesn’t matter if there are other brothas out there, you just want us. Trust me ladies, do that for your man tonight (Or when you finally get some time). I promise, he’ll appreciate it, in more ways than one. And of course, you’ll know, cause you’ll see it (wink!!)!!
More to come…
“Come, let us return to the Lord . He has torn us to pieces but he will heal us; he has injured us but he will bind up our wounds. After two days he will revive us; on the third day he will restore us, that we may live in his presence. Let us acknowledge the Lord ; let us press on to acknowledge him. As surely as the sun rises, he will appear; he will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth.”
Hosea 6:1-3 NIV
Today is the day we remember the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Today some call easter, but today represents something Christians all over the world can be inspired by. It’s a day we can remember that every issue, every battle we’ve gone through has not been in vein. It’s a day that represents the ultimate healing in our lives. People have left us for dead for some time, but God is doing something new for us. He’s rolling back the stone on what was supposed to be our grave and telling us to rise and get up. Get up so that we can finally become who we were truly meant to be.
You see, God designed our lives to be great. Great in Love, great in relationships with others, even great in business. The thing is, it doesn’t always happen immediately. There will be a time when we all go through something. Times when we all feel as if we need a break or that life is not going as we planned. In that time we will most likely also face some of the more harsh realities we’ve ever dealt with. Whether it be financial turmoil, marriages that are failing, or issues on our job, or just everything in general. The thing about that is, things just may not seem like they are going the way they should, but we have recognize one truly important thing. God’s plan for us is rarely what we expected in the beginning. We all set expectations only to see them fail, but God’s plan will never fail. Knowing that the world will see our downtrodden times as our demise, He designed the Resurrection, not as a comeback tour, but as a new experience all together. He restores us, not to something old, but something brand new, better than before. We may look the same on the outside, but our interior has truly changed. And those changes are designed to not only prosper us, but bring the Glory that only God truly deserves.
Today let’s pray and be mindful that the issues of our past, present, or potential future don’t last forever. We will be prosperous, we will find Love again, and we will walk in the Paradise that God has designed specifically for us!!!
The time when adolescents become teenagers, and teens become young adults. A place of Friday Night Lights, and spring time basketball games. The different groups, like the cool kids, the lunch room hangouts, study halls, and of course PE shorts (LOL!!)
Now normally, I wouldn’t talk about my time in high school, because it was somewhat of a forgettable experience. I was kind of a dork and social misfit. I guess you could say I was a nerd. It’s funny, because the conversations I had with people were things like, “Hey Jason, do you still make good grades?” What? Did you seriously ask me about school work at school? Yeah, that’s what I remember about high school. I will say this say this though, the one thing I remember and miss most about high school was the romance. Or the types of romance that happens when you’re a kid.
As I’ve gone through life, I’ve discovered so many things about myself. I’ve gone through breakups, make ups, relationships, marriages, etc. Through it all I’ve come to learn so many different things about myself. One things the most prevalent lessons I have learned from high school is how to show love. I’m not saying I learned it all from that time, but there are some important aspects of love I did glean from school. When I mention the relationships in high school, the things I remember most are times when we held hands. The times when we smiled, almost uncontrollably at times. Being giddy at the thought of a note being passed from your sweetheart. I miss talking on the phone all hours of the night, scared one of our parents would embarrass us and tell us to get off the phone. I think that was the tip of the iceberg there. Especially the first time I kissed a girl in the middle of the hallway (thank you Joy Hughes). It was pretty special that someone liked me enough to be seen with me in that way.
Fast forward to adulthood, and I realize that I’m just not as bold as I once was. Just not as romantic. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I still love the romance. I still love the candles, and intimacy, it’s just that I don’t get as much of chance to show it, right? Could be that, or could it be that I don’t go out of my way to make the time for those things I once thought to be so important. I look back and think about the times where I couldn’t stop smiling because I liked a girl that much. Then I think now to how much I try to hide my smile when I’m into someone. It just feels like a different world, that’s all.
Like I said, as adults we just aren’t the way we used to be. Maybe that’s the reason for so many failed marriages and relationships. Maybe that’s the reason why people go to work and they’re not as happy. Or why they take other parts of their lives so seriously. I think that everybody could use somebody to hold hands with. Or someone to walk through the hallways smiling at. You know the kind of smile that makes someone think, ‘they need to get a room’. Hahaha. I just think that it’s just time for us to go back to displaying that child-like exuberance. You know what I’m saying! I have found so many marriages that have taken that for granted. When one person acts silly, all the other says is stop playing. Or when the other wants to be passionate, and kiss, or hug, they hear, “I don’t feel like it, or “not tonight”. Some have just chosen not to show emotion at all, except for in a fight or argument. It’s kinda sad, really.
I think we need to be careful about denying ourselves the very pleasures in life that got us here. The same pleasures that lead us to meeting our spouses or significant others. Those very same things that made you ask her to marry you are the same things she’s looking for in you now. I hear those say that high school was then, and that it needs to be left behind. In all honesty, that’s the only part of high school I wish would return. That’s the part that shoulda never left. Let’s go back and remember That Young Love. That Ol’ Skool Lovin’…Those are the things that make us, well…us.
I’m waiting for that to come back. Cause I can’t wait to see it again.
More to come…